Fallen
by Adrienne L. Mendal
Summary: Hermione had changed for the worst during the summer before 7th year. She lost herself in pain and destruction, she didn’t care anymore. Only one person was there to save her, her enemy.


Summary: Hermione had changed for the worst during the summer before 7th year. She lost herself in pain and destruction, she didn't care anymore. Only one person was there to save her, her enemy.

**WARNING: There will be self harm in this, possible eating disorders, sexual interactions, and more. If you don't like any of these DO NOT READ! Thank you!**

A/N: This is a Draco/Hermione fan fic. I have based this on a song called Fallen by Sarah McLachlan. All of HBP will be ignored. It did not happen!

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters that you would find in the Harry Potter series. Also, I don't own the song this is based on.

**Fallen**

Chpater 1: The Beginning

My family took a turn for the worst. My mother and father divorced during my 6th year, they didn't tell me until I came back during summer break. All summer I was passed back and forth from each parent's house. My sanity was passed along with it, lost in the mix. Harry and Ron went to this new Quidditch camp, they hadn't written to me all summer. They didn't care, no one cared anymore. So I slipped into my hole, black and deep hole. Somewhere far away from here, I was where no one could hurt me, only myself.

* * *

"Mother you don't understand. I don't want to be passed around anymore. I feel like some toy! Just leave me alone!" I said to my mother with fury. It was something beyond anger, something much much more.

"Hermione you're going to have to get used to it. I can't change what happened, really I don't want to. You're just going to have to deal with it." My mother said to me. She just didn't understand she never understood anything; she just wanted me to suffer.

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" I yelled to my mother, and ran up the stairs to my room.

I slammed my door shut and pressed my back against it. My breathing was heavy and something was coming out of its hidden spot, want. I wanted it and need it. My body slowly slid to the floor, but before it could hit I jumped back up.

'It has to be here somewhere' I thought to myself. 'Where is it?'

Then there it was, hidden in my drawer, where I put it the last time I used it. It was perfect in every way. It was sharp and shiny. The handle was made out of silver and a snake was craved into it. I don't exactly remember where I found it, but I remember how. But that wasn't important anymore, only what it helped me with.

I took the handle into my right hand. I let it lay in my hand as I stared at the handle. I was examining it, looking for clues to how it made me so happy, how it kept my secrets. I wrapped my fingers around the handle and then looked at my reflection, there was still a dark red liquid left from its last use.

I turned my head; I was ashamed of what I saw. I slowly pressed the sharp edge against my left wrist. Then I slowly bring it upward, where it formed a cut, and the same dark red liquid came out.

Pain washed over me, and I was happy. Just to feel the pain, to know I was actually alive and not living in this nightmare truly made me happy. So I repeated cutting myself two more times, just to make sure my mind wasn't fooling around with myself.

Then my mother started to bang on my door, and I heard my door knob twisting revealing that my door was looked when it didn't open.

"Hermione why the hell is your door locked? Get out of here dinner is ready!" she sounded angry.

I quickly went into my own bathroom and got some tissue's to clean off the blade of the knife. I didn't want to leave evidence this time. I looked for cloth to put onto my new marks and changed my shirt to long sleeves. It was cold in the house, she wouldn't notice.

* * *

I sat at the dinning room table and silence filled the air. It was always silent when we ate. We never talked anymore. She didn't care about me and I know, she told me. I didn't really want to eat, I hadn't really eaten a full meal in two weeks, she wouldn't notice.

But then I realized, I would be going to Hogwarts tomorrow and I would be the Head Girl.

* * *

I had gotten my school supplies the week before while I was staying at my dad's house. He lived right in London. As I entered Kings Cross it was especially busy today. Muggles walked along unnoticed to the witch who walked to the entrance for Platform 9 ¾. I walked through the barrier quickly only to be quickly suffocated by a bunch of red heads.

"Hermione, how have you been?" You heard Ron say out of everyone around myself.

"I've been good" I lied, they didn't need to know.

"What did you do all summer" Ginny asked, like they wanted to really know.

"Nothing really, just hung out watched television…" I was cut off, figures.

"Television?" Ron had said.

"Yes, a muggle thing." I said back.

"Ohh… I see!" He just said back, nothing interesting.

"Yeah, I made Head Girl" I said this with a slight hold back to there reactions, which where jumping for joy and more hugging.

"That's great Hermione! Oh I am so happy for you" Harry had told me.

"Thanks" I know he really didn't care. But I had to pretend they did.

"Hey lets go get a compartment, they probably are almost full by now" Ginny had said.

So we all quickly said good bye to Mr. And Mrs. Weasley, then we where off in search for a compartment. We didn't find one quickly but we did find one, the very last one in the back of the train.

"Hey guy's I need to go to the head compartment right now so I will see you all at the feast ok." I had to pretend I cared; I didn't want them to know.

"Ok have fun!" Harry had said to me.

* * *

So I was off to find the head compartment. I knew it was somewhere in the front of the train, just didn't know where. I finally found it after about 5 minutes of walking. It said 'Head Room' on a gold plat that was attached to the door.

I walked in and the Head Boy wasn't there yet so I just sat down and looked at my hands which where folded in my lap. I didn't realize that I was crying until I saw wet spots on my pants I was wearing. I sat there for a good 10 minutes before someone else walked in; it just happened to be the Head Boy, Draco Malfoy.

"What are you doing here?" he said with a sneer.

"I'm the new Head Girl Malfoy, have a problem?"

"Yeah, now I have to share my space at my last year at Hogwarts with a mudblood."

"Don't call me a mudblood!"

"You're going to have to deal with it."

"Just leave me alone Malfoy! Just go away." more tears started to fall from my eye's, this was a bad time for a mental breakdown.

"Why the hell are you crying Granger? Did I hurt your feelings?"

"Just go away Malfoy!" I had stood up by now and my knee's gave out and I fell to the floor and I started to cry into my hands.

"Just leave me alone."

"To hell I'm going to leave you alone. What's wrong?" he actually started to sound like he actually cared.

"You want to know what's wrong with me. My life has fallen apart. Are you happy now, happy that you know that yes Hermione Granger has finally cracked? Are you happy now?" My voice increasingly got louder until I yelled the last line.

He stood there shocked as I looked up at him. "I'm sorry" where the only words that came out of his mouth. He sat down and looked like he was in shock.

I steadily picked myself off the floor and sat down on the seat. This was going to be a long and hard year. There would be more misery and pain on my part. While I was trying to act like miss perfect. Then it hit me, I told him some of my secret.

'Isn't that just great' I thought.

But what I didn't realize then, things would be different this year. It would be for the better and for the worse. Hogwarts was going to change and so was the people in it, new things would arises on the Hogwarts grounds, which would change its history forever.

* * *

A/N: I hope you liked it. I should be updating every week. If it takes longer I am sorry but I will have the next chapter up soon, since it's the end of my summer break and I have nothing to do. Please review it does help inspire me to write faster and have quick updates. And yes I will be looking for a beta so please e-mail me or leave it in your review if you want to beta for me. Oh and leave your e-mail address if you want to. Thanks and good bye for now! 


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